Sixteen feet...

[banaari 27]

The floating love object is currently in the care of a suitably qualified individual, with me doing the stuff that requires neither intelligence, experience or finesse.

Anyway, all high art comes out of suffering, so here goes:

 

I was born one morning when the sun wouldn't float

I bought me a sander and I drove to the boat

I sand sixteen feet of fibreglass hull

And the boat builder said "Well a-bless ma soul"

 

     You sand sixteen feet and whaddya get

     Another day older and deeper in debt

     Saint Peter don't you call me 'cause I can't go

     I owe my soul to the chandlery store

 

A week in the fo'csle is an absolute must

A-sandin' and a-grindin' and a-breathin' dust

But don't you believe you're done with that chore

'Cause the boat builder says "Just a little bit more"

 

Break Out Another Thousand equals B-O-A-T

But the thousands keep coming and there's GST

No matter what you pay there's always one more bill

If the berthing don't get you then insurance will

 

I loved me a woman she was mighty fine

But she hated the boat and she found it tryin'

She said to me "Honey, it's that boat or me"

I said to her "Baby, better leave your key"

 

Some say a man he comes from the dust

But a boat owner's made out of blisters and rust

Blisters and rust and muscle and skin

Skin that's thick and a wallet that's thin

 

There's two things a man needs to go to the sea

A favourable wind and some CRC

But the best laid plans are brought to a halt

By another f***ing seized-up slot-head bolt